"we need to sort out thursday"

okay, so september comes and everyone leaves.

i have one thing to say about it all: I DO NOT LIKE IT.

everything has changed almost instantly. it's like the summer left and so did everyone else. stupid seasons.

so here's how it goes.

everything was completely fine, amazing actually. i had everything i ever wanted. i had my boyfriend who was perfect. i had the best friends i could ever find, i was going on a beautiful summer holiday with them and i never had to go to school again.

now? i've only just got my boyfriend back, it's a little different but it's still good. i still have my friends, all of them, but they're all changing. my best friend has a bug up her butt about something but she won't tell me what that is... and now everyone's disappearing off to university. i am terrified. my most fashionable friend started today, texting me at 11.30am to tell me that she was already in starbucks talking to an irish boy who was clearly in love with himself. my big brother (who isn't actually my big brother but acts like it) is leaving on saturday.

so far, that's what everyone's focused on. fashionista started uni today, sure, but she's only in london and she's living at home, so we're not losing her. big brother is going to manchester. on saturday. it's going to be so strange. his girlfriend sees him all the time and in our group, next to me and fashionista, she's one of the toughest chicks around. she's a mess without him and it's so sad that they have to be apart...

so on thursday we're all going out for leaving drinks for big brother. i'm not really sure how it's gonna go to be honest, it could be really sad or really fun... i really don't know... i'll let you know.

all i do know is that big brother has been there for two years, helping me with weird problems, giving me cigarettes when i didn't have any, missing school just to go to the park and play on the swings and then back to mine to drink beer. on a monday. i guess i'm also gonna miss the fact that he always looks out for me and does the "big brother conversation" with any guy who comes near me.

but he likes my boyfriend... so i guess i'll be okay.